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Practical Guide - Part Four: Understanding shopping and restaurants in the Philippines.

So, you are finally settled into your hotel, have sidestepped the vendors and beggars, and avoided the scammers. Now you venture forth and opt to go shopping in a store, at the mall, or go out to eat at a private restaurant, or at a large chain of restaurants.

So let�s start off with restaurants. You gotta be hungry by now, and after one glance at the overpriced � poor quality/taste of the hotel�s room-service, you figure it ok to look around at some local eateries. Lets begin with �local private� restaurants: (lets put the REALLY local places�called �canteens� at this moment, as they tend to be �sweet and simple� with simple food, simple REALLY cheap prices, and simple service�.sort of like an �eat cheap and go� place. Now fuss, no muss)

Local Private Restaurants:

a) There are many terrific restaurants in the Philippines and many not-so-terrific. A fancy expensive place doesn�t necessarily mean its any good, and a simple economical place doesn�t mean it�s not good. It�s really a hit and miss, unless you have a recommendation by another local expat.
b) You will often enter a restaurant with smiles and welcome, but on some occasions, that is where the professionalism ceases. The positives are easy to recognize, but are fewer and far between.
c) Usually they will seat you at the most obviously easy and convenient spot for them, as opposed to your comfort. Perhaps you are too far from the aircon, or right under the blowing aircon. Sometimes there are patrons seated beside/behind you who are chain-smoking. Often the music is too loud.
d) Sometimes the menus arrive promptly and sometimes not. Sometimes they ask you for your choice of drink, and sometimes they �forget�. Its often like a �hit and miss� when it comes to service in the PI. It is common for the waiter to hand you the menu, and stay standing there till you place the order. Other times its common for them to hand you the menu and disappear from sight.
e) Don�t expect anything, and you won�t be surprised.
f) English is a second language here, but avoid using any words more complicated past a first-grader, otherwise there might be frequent misunderstandings.
g) Several larger restaurants will charge you a 15% service-charge (i.e. �forced tip�) on the menu�in the super-fine print somewhere in the menu. These kinda places have diminished recently, as customers have either refused to eat there, or forcefully declined to pay any �service charge�. The comment I have frequently heard from customers who discover this �surprise� is �Its YOUR job to pay your staff�not mine.�
h) It is standard practice for the wait-staff to know absolutely nothing about any and all items on the menu. Often they must transfer your question to another staff member. It is quite �normal� for the menu-item you have a question regarding�be the one that they think you are ordering. Pointing to items on the menu that you aren�t sure about ordering, might imply to the staff that you ARE ordering it.
i) Recommendations, suggestions, and notifications of specials of non-stock items is rare.
j) It is common for you to order an item, even two�..on the menu that is �sorry, out of stock�. Not only won�t they inform you of those items before, they might even only tell you�twenty minutes after you have ordered it�and your companion�s food has already arrived.
k) Beware of asking for anything �non-standard� on the menu, or modification thereof. The staff tends to be utterly absent of multi-tasking skills, lacking anything beyond elemental English skills. If you ask for something like: �Please change my potatoes with my steak for extra vegetables� it will appear served to you as: The original Steak & Potatoes, with the original quantity of vegetables, PLUS an extra side-order of vegetables (added to the bill, of course). If along with your drink, you ask for two glasses, one with ice, one without, you will most probably receive either two empty glasses, two glasses with ice, or remarkably�.even two extra glasses filled with your drink�leaving you with three glasses.
l) It is amazingly common for them to follow a logic of: First cooked is first out habit in the Philippines. I mean this with utter seriousness, so don�t lose you cool, when your partner�s BBQ Pork with Rice shows up a full fifteen minutes before your Burger and Fries. Complaining, returning, canceling orders doesn�t help, as in the PI�the customer is almost always viewed as WRONG. If you thing asking them prior to bring the food out at the same time�will make any difference�don�t fret�.it seldom will. Even if they follow your request, all that might happen is your friend receiving cold BBQ Pork and Rice, while you receive piping-hot Burger and Fries. Welcome to the land that logic forgot.
m) If you are brought the wrong item on the menu, YOU can expect to be blamed for YOU being the one who ordered it, when all you had done was perhaps ask about it. Make no mistake. The customer is frequently blamed for any errors the establishment/staff makes, and if you refuse to pay for it, the staff member is deducted his salary to repay it, which they will rarely refrain from openly advising you. Its not anyone�s fault. Its just the �way it is� in the Philippines.
n) Often after the food is finally served, the wait-staff disappear from view�seemingly uncaring if you should require anything further. It�s not uncommon for them to even forget to bring you condiments of cutlery, so its best to scope out the table before the wait-staff wander off too far. If you want a second drink�good luck in some establishments.
o) Collecting your bill goes in extremes. Either it�s dropped off to you without your request, or you have to hunt someone down, and wait fifteen minutes to get it.
p) It�s not uncommon for foreign tourist to be outright �asked� for a tip, while local customers nearby rarely leave anything or only a few mere 1 peso coins. Remember, you are the �rich white whale�. If one waiter takes your order, and another merely drops off the food once, it is not uncommon for BOTH to ask/expect a tip from the �rich white whale�.

The point of this all, is�..don�t get frustrated�keep smiling�and move on. Just remember that it�s like visiting a huge kindergarten.

Major Chain Restaurants:

These are often centered on fast food establishments. These are almost always busy, as the national fetish whirls towards fast food. These places are often crowded, often with children. In a world where most students bring their own lunch, in the Philippines they ALL opt to eat out, despite the obvious expense at doing that every school day, which makes the weekday lunch-time period a crowded mess.

It is completely normal in these places to be stared at �up and down� by the other diners. Stared at while ordering, walking by, and even while eating. It isn�t unusual for even adults, to walk by you�while you are eating�and glance at your plate. It isn�t viewed as rude, it is merely a childlike-curiosity the envelopes this culture and society. Don�t take is as negative, just smile. If some total stranger asks you what country you are from and other questions far more personal�.don�t fret. They are just harmlessly curious.

Shopping:

Here lies the humor and irony of it all. Shopping in the Philippines is actually a real and genuine �adventure�. Fun as can be�provided you relax and understand the culture.

Small Private Shops:

a) Its normal to be viewed in extremes. You are either jumped on upon entry to a store (being the �white whale with many money�) or ignored completely. Customer service is either overdone or not done at all. There is either a disinterest in serving anyone, or an obsessive interest in selling you the whole store.
b) Prices in the �ignore aura� stores are usually ridiculously cheap, but their stock is limited, size is limited, and colors are limited. Selling you a light fixture with no comparative bulbs in-stock or even carried is viewed as �standard� practice.
c) Prices in the �obsessive interest aura� stores, are usually never market, and are severely inflated on-the-spur-of-the-moment�based on how unashamedly greedy the owner/staff is. By inflated, I mean that an item worth retail at 100 peso, will be offered to you at 900 peso. After you raise and eyebrow, an excuse is usually given�false�of course. After you turn your back, an INSTANT �discount� is lashed at you�of 400 peso. This is viewed to them as a discount, while for you, it appears to be an insult. Don�t be insulted, as that is the way it is here�to the �great white whale with big money�. After you tell them 200 peso or bye bye, they will give you a sob-story and ask for 350 peso. Don�t waste your time unless it�s your hobby to bargain over a $4 dollar item.
d) When you finally settle on a 250 peso price, and hand them three 100 peso bills (300 peso) it is common from them to ask you if they can keep the change of 50 peso. Greed is adamant till the last drop here�..in the tourist-areas.

Shopping Malls:

a) The malls in the Philippines are VERY popular to the population. Many/most of them are merely �loitering�, �wandering�, or �window shopping�, as the prices are somewhat prohibitive to the local people. The Food Courts are always swarming though. They will have stores at all pricing levels. Lower-prices shops, medium priced shops, and expensive shops with US-prices.

b) Walking into these malls, you will commonly be approached by sleazy looking guys, holding a small strip of scribbled paper, mumbling to you: �Change Dolla�, which means, they want to slither you off somewhere to change US Dollars, and either cheat you, short-change you, or hand you counterfeits. AVOID�period�end of story. You might be approached by someone (new scam lately) usually a woman, claiming she �lost her purse� and asking for your help with a �few� peso. Its basically a sophisticated form of begging.

c) Any strangers claiming to be �your friend� or even �working for or with your hotel� might approach you and try to lead you to harms/scams way. Avoid them at all costs�even if they somehow know your first name and your hotel, as they might have asked the doorman and followed you from there. Don�t take anything for granted.

d) Remember that you are often in the �land that logic forgot�, so don�t get frustrated if mall employees or store-sales-staff either don�t understand you (in a country where English is supposedly a second language) or simply have no clue to any answer, and often have to ask several other employees to find the answer. It is either they are shy talk their limited English to you, and will automatically shift you to the �better speaker�, and/or they truly have no clue as to the answer. Many of them have very little knowledge or training as to their jobs, or the merchandise they are selling. Its like being in a candy store with children working there. Don�t get mad or frustrated. Just try to be understanding.

e) Often they don�t have clothing in your larger size. Often they don�t have the color you seek. That is common and normal. Shopping there should be fun, rather than felt as a challenge.
Often prices are �tiered� where there is one �regular� price, and another �discount� price. A discount is normally always asked for by Filipino shoppers�automatically, so the retailers merely hike the price up, and then lower it to the �discounted� price�just so that the Filipino customer feels better�thinking they have gotten a discount, when they have not. This kinda pricing is legal here. Be aware, that as soon as you mention paying my credit card, you are often notified that the �discounted� price is inapplicable.

f) You will notice way too many salespeople standing around, many of them saying: �good afternoon sir/maam� to you, a foreigner, but ignoring other Filipinos who walk by. I don�t know if this is a formal training that they receive from their employer, or if it is a self-induced habit. The over-staffing seems rampant, especially when most of them will have no clue as to the items/department they are working in, hence have to ask-down-the-line to another.

g) Upon approaching the cashier, you might notice (depending on the time and day) a lineup, which although short, seems to take forever. There is one cashier and one �bagger�, often a third employee standing there as well. You would think they would open the other opposing register, but no. Only one of those employees is authorized to be a cashier. Often the delays seem ludicrous��non-scanning merchandise, no UPC code, no price, etc. Sometimes the customer ahead of you miscalculated on their purchase budget, and items must be voided. Sometimes the person uses a credit card that isn�t honored.

h) Upon placing your purchase in the bag, the receipt often must be signed again by the bagger, or the other employee standing there, after which the bag is tied shut or stapled closed, with the receipt exposed and flapping in the wind. That is to discourage shoplifting and to show security when you leave that it has been paid for.

i) It isn�t uncommon for you to return to your hotel or to a restaurant that you have already visited, along with your new purchase, and have the staff comment to you: �Oh, you went shopping�. Shopping is a national pastime here (just to go, even if they don�t buy anything) so merely smile and say yes. Expect them to ask you what you bought, for how much, and ask to see it. This is all normal here in the Philippines.

Next��..

Practical Guide � Part Five: A guide to the single male/female in the Philippines.


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