I think the critical word here is WANT.
I am assuming you disappointed most of those men.. they may not all have wanted affairs, probably something less long-term than that even.
What your ex-colleague was doing was probing to see how open YOU were to the idea of a little bedroom-action. You didn't realise? Hey, do you want a written invitation? A letter of intent?
Maybe this is typical of a male, but falling off the faithful-wagon is so different to having a mistress.
A drunken quickie at the office party (hello 888! they weren't just going over the annual sales figures.. they were 'going over the annual sales figures'!) is not at all similar to having a secret life that you hide from your partner.
I'm not even going to give my own opinion on how OK either case is or not. That's not relevant.
There is a certain amount of flirtation, maybe, a lot of wishful thinking, and a one-in-a-billion chance of the males (let's not kid ourselves, it IS usually males) getting what they want.
Don't forget, not every positive response to flirting actually goes ahead, past first base, and makes it all the way into home-run territory.
In Abu Dhabi, there are thousands of hard-working men away from their wives and families. They don't even have a microscopic chance of hooking up with someone for a one night stand. Not even an electron-microscopic chance. Or a nanoscopic chance. So don't give all those wives back home any more reason to worry.
Let's try it the other way round: How many of your friends have you heard from who have admitted to being the mistress of a married man? In AD? Or even something with less commitment?